May 30, 2022
Happy Pride! More color - for everyone!
by Lena Severin
June is Pride Month! We think that's a reason to celebrate. We celebrate the diversity that we find in ourselves and in our fellow human beings. We celebrate diversity and colorfulness, and self-love.
That's why June is a meaningful month not just for the LGBTQIA+ community, but for all of us. It's about spreading openness, acceptance and appreciation for EVERYONE. It's about clearing up prejudices, creating space to question our own thought patterns. It's about moving forward as a society, but also individually. We want to contribute to this.
Unconscious Bias - Do you know the term?
That's what we're talking about in the first week of June: unconscious bias. Many people don't know the term, but most of us are confronted with it in our own minds every day. What does the term mean? Let me give you a simple example:
Imagine a couple. Observe this image closely in your mind.
Was it a man and a woman?
Why isn't it two women or two men? Why isn't it a non-binary couple? Why only two people?
Every day we are bombarded with thousands of associations. These, in turn, are shaped by everything we experience and absorb. We associate with what is presented to us by the media and society - and in most cases this unfortunately does not correspond to the diversity of our reality. Because it is much more colorful, there is much more than just the couple from your imagination. So where does our unconscious bias come from? From a lack of representation and normalization. And that's exactly what we need to change.
We want to advocate for more diversity. We want to depict this wonderful diversity of our world as accurately as possible. And not just for Pride Month, but always. Because rethinking starts with us.
Creating space - our campaign for the start of Pride Month
We would like to use this month to shake us all up a little and get us thinking. And about our own unconscious bias. First of all, it's not a bad thing if you imagined the "classic" image of a woman with a man in my example earlier. It's only bad if this image is still seen as the norm and everything else is perceived as abnormal. Who decides what is normal?
I would describe myself as a very open, enlightened person who is always learning. And yet I still often catch myself putting my associations through the brainwashing machine. Do you sometimes feel the same way? That's no reason to be ashamed or not allowed to admit something like that. In fact, recognizing your own unconscious bias is a very important step in the right direction. This is the only way to set the mental dominoes in motion that we use to visualize our reality. And it looks much more colorful with an alert eye.
Wake up. The content creators, with whom we were able to set up a wonderful campaign, do this in their own very special way. They provide insights into their lives as queer people, report on problems and their experiences, answer questions and Tone . They are doing important work by sharing their lives with us and we are very grateful that they are doing so this week via our social media channels.
Pride - because we can all use a little more color in our lives
However, unconscious bias is also an issue for people in the LGBTQIA+ community. In our childhood and youth, we absorb everything from our environment like a sponge, including heteronormative role models. For many queer people, it is a long process to differentiate themselves from these and the associated unconscious bias. We are taught from an early age what is "normal" and what is expected of us. If only heterosexual cis life circumstances are exemplified by parents, in the media and in our personal environment, or if only sexual relationships between men and women are covered in sex education lessons at school, then as a queer person you eventually come to the unpleasant realization that you are not normal and do not belong.
A very sad and marginalizing realization. Many queer people therefore develop the desire to be as "normal" as possible and to fly under the radar so as not to draw attention to their own difference. When I swipe through the profiles on queer dating portals as a gay man, I always notice a real hatred within the community. You read statements like "only straight-acting" or "heterolike", people are looking for "normal" masculine guys: "Masc4Masc", just no one who is open and self-confident about their own sexuality and identity. This self-hatred is also called internalized homophobia, biphobia, transphobia, etc. We project our insecurity onto ourselves and others and ask ourselves very situationally aware: "Is this too gay or too queer, how I dress, how I speak, how I behave?"
Unfortunately, this restrictive self-reflection has not only internalized but also external reasons. Before I go somewhere, I think very carefully about how authentic I can appear there. Before I kiss my date in public or hold hands with them, I have already practiced the standard shoulder glance. Before I dare to come out of my shell in any situation, the first question I always ask myself is: "Am I safe here? Is this a safe space? Or do I have to worry about exposing myself to homophobic insults or even physical violence?"
Because discrimination and hate crime are still the order of the day for many of us today. You wouldn't think it, given everything our community has already achieved for itself and the naturalness with which the community now engages in social dialog. But to give you a few examples: I am very hesitant at the thought of going to a straight club or walking past groups of bawling teenagers on the way home. And if I do go to a straight club or a public festival or something similar, I think twice about what clothes I wear, how I don't draw too much attention to myself or 'fly under the radar'.
So what is the answer to all these worrying circumstances?
More education and more visibility for queer people in all areas of life. Because with more presence and information, future generations of queer people may no longer feel so marginalized and different. And that's why it's worth taking to the streets and demonstrating. That's why we need Pride - because we can all use a little more color in our lives!
Your Lena & your Michael
